Edited and adapted from Ari’s Grill & Torah on Dec. 2, 2026
Well, it’s Friday. I’m not outside doing a grill. I tried, actually, and the grill would not cooperate in this rain and freezing cold weather. As I said, no complaining. Rain is a blessing in Israel, so just say Baruch Hashem, thank God, and let’s hope it keeps raining. It’s unbelievable for the crops and for the farmers and everybody else who needs this rain in Israel, for drinking water and whatnot. So we say thank God for the rain. No complaining over the rain. But the grill will not be working today, unfortunately.
We’re going to talk a little bit about Parshat Toldot, this week’s parsha. Esav and Yaakov. This is really the beginning of such a horrific relationship, one that went from bad to worse as they went on.
The Man of the Field and the Man in the Tent
I always asked, why did the Jewish sages, from birth, even from the womb, call Esav a nasty person? We have freedom of choice. How is that possible? I don’t know if we can explain it in a literal sense, that Esav was evil from birth. Already in the womb, they talk about Esav wanting to run out toward idol worship and Yaakov wanting to run out toward worshiping God. What’s going on here? What is the real difference between Esav and Yaakov?
It says that Esav is an ish sadeh, a man of the field, and Yaakov is a yoshev ohalim. Yaakov sits in the tent. So what does it mean that Esav is a man of the field and Yaakov sits in the tent? And is either one better? This one is all in the field, and this one is all in the tent. Is there supposed to be some kind of merger between the two personalities?
Esav is always in the field working, and Yaakov is in the tent. Chazal talk about him studying Torah and worrying about internal things. Is either one an absolute way of life? Is one always supposed to be in the tent dealing only with spiritual things, or is one supposed to be in the field dealing only with this world? Is there some kind of middle ground here?
If there is a middle road, did Yaakov have that middle road? Esav, we know, didn’t. He was all sheker. It’s false. Everything’s in this world. Everything’s tangible. Physical, physical, physical. And Yaakov is all spiritual, spiritual, spiritual. They seem to be two opposites. What do we do with that? Are we supposed to be one of those extremes, or is there a middle road?
What’s interesting is that when they named Yaakov, it says, “Vayikra shmo Yaakov.” It’s in the singular. “He called his name Yaakov.” When it came to Esav, it says they called him Esav, in the plural. So who named Yaakov, and who named Esav? Did Yaakov have only one person naming him, only Yitzchak, and with Esav, did a bunch of people name him? Why is it plural when they name Esav and singular when they name Yaakov?
Yaakov stands for the ultimate truth, even if you want to call it an ultimate truth that really can’t exist in this world. We have to eat. We have to sleep. There are physical things we have to do in this world. There are mitzvot, commandments, that we have to do that are full of physical things. Yaakov seems to be someone whose whole world is in spirituality, while Esav’s whole world is in gashmiut, as we call it in Hebrew, mundane, worldly things. They’re diametrical opposites.
Someone who has money, big cars, fancy cars, fancy houses, is very popular in this world, right? There’s nothing wrong with money or fancy cars or fancy houses. The question is what you do with it in this world. But if the amount you attain in this world is your goal, then you’re missing life. Esav’s goal was to attain that physical pleasure, that gashmiut. He really wasn’t worried about the spiritual side of the world. Yaakov’s goal was to attain spirituality in this world.
And therefore, when it came to Esav, they named him. He’s very popular. When it comes to Yaakov, the guy is sitting in a tent. He’s dealing in meditation or spirituality. That’s not so popular. People are like, “Ah, he’s a weirdo.” So with Yaakov it’s vayikra. One person named Yaakov.
What Did Esav Sell?
It’s a crazy story, a really crazy story from beginning to end. Esav comes back from the field, from his hunting, and Yaakov is stirring his soup, according to the Jewish sages. Esav says, “Can I have some of your soup?” And Yaakov says to him, “Sell me the rights of the firstborn and you can have my soup.”
What rights of the firstborn are we talking about? Is Yaakov playing a game on Esav? But the bigger question is that Esav says yes. He says, “I’m about to die. What do I care about the rights of the firstborn?” So number one, what are those rights? Number two, was Esav really about to die? And number three, what is Yaakov thinking here?
The rights of the firstborn aren’t tangible. They’re not physical wealth. It’s not like today when someone leaves a will and gives a double portion. In fact, when it comes to wealth, Esav got it. The rights of the firstborn are all spiritual. It’s the line from Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov down to the tribes, down to Moshe, David, Shlomo, everyone.
Look at today. We do have oil. We found oil in Israel, but the countries around us are packed with oil and natural resources. Here in Israel, we’re making the desert bloom, and with us it’s really hard work. We came into swamps here, and we had to work our fingers to the bone. Literally, people died making this country bloom. It wasn’t like, “Oh, look at that. We found oil, and we just sell it to the rest of the world, and we’re very wealthy.” That’s just not the way it works in Israel, ever, by the way. Everything we do is extremely difficult work. We look at some of our neighbors, and they’re literally drowning in oil. They’re kings and princes. They hire people, and they’re sitting back. These sheikhs are multi-quadrillionaires.
And then people say, “The chosen nation? That’s racist.” My God, look at the history of the chosen nation. People understand the word chosen wrong. Chosen means we were given more responsibility. If anyone out there thinks that being the chosen nation is an easy thing, I mean, really, come on. Would you like me to go through history? Think about Lavan. Or go back to the very beginning, to Avraham, who was thrown into the fire for believing in this one God. Then Yishmael and Yitzchak, then Esav and Yaakov. There was never an easy time. It was never, “Oh, this is simple because we’re chosen.” We were given more responsibility, and therefore the consequences are much worse when we don’t fulfill those responsibilities.
So Esav comes back from his day’s work, whatever he’s doing, and he says to Yaakov, “I’m dying of thirst here. I don’t care about those rights.” In fact, as far as he’s concerned, those rights are horrible. Forget responsibility for a minute. Those firstborn rights have consequences, and Esav understood the consequences. We’ve been paying the consequences of those firstborn rights since the beginning of time.
So he says, “Why do I care about those firstborn rights when I’m about to die now? I don’t want to go through that suffering.” Yaakov says, “No problem. Here’s the soup. Enjoy your worldly thing right now. I will take the future.”
Why Is Esav Angry?
Then come the brachot. It says that Yitzchak loved Esav. Why? Esav was actually bribing Yitzchak, and it says that Yitzchak loved Esav for that reason. Rivka understood, “No, no, no. We can’t have this happen.” Those blessings that Yitzchak is giving out are for responsibility, and that can’t go to Esav.
Yaakov went through a whole process, which we’re not going to go through right now, and the brachot were given to Yaakov. And Esav goes crazy. Why are you going crazy, Esav? You didn’t want the brachot. You didn’t want that responsibility. You wanted this world. You wanted riches in this world. What are you getting so upset for?
Then Yitzchak gives Esav a bracha, which happens to be materialistic, and he’s still not okay with it. He’s angry at Yaakov. Why is he angry at Yaakov? Because Esav symbolizes total dishonesty, a total lack of integrity. As far as he’s concerned, this world is what’s important. But then, when he sees the reward, he goes, “Ah, wait. It’s mine, it’s mine, it’s mine.”
There’s one other pasuk in this week’s parsha that really blew my mind. We’re talking about lies and truth, about the spiritual and the physical. The Plishtim filled up the wells with sand. Instead of using the water, they destroyed the wells. And it’s the same story. When you don’t have truth, you’ll destroy even things that you can use in order to show your hatred.
What Do You Do with the Traits You Have?
Rav Shimshon Rafael Hirsch, one of the famous sages of German Jewry, said that Esav becoming a rasha, an evil person, was actually Yitzchak’s fault. Why was it Yitzchak’s fault? Because Esav was a doer, and Yitzchak stuck him in the classroom, and that ruined him.
“Educate the children according to their path.” You can’t stick someone who’s a doer into a classroom where they don’t do anything, just read the books. And you can’t stick someone who really wants to hit the books out in a field. Those aren’t their traits. You have to educate the next generation according to what they understand. That’s a very important principle taught in this week’s parsha.
So being an ish sadeh, being a doer, is not a bad thing. If you’re an active person, someone who can do things with his hands, you have to learn how to use those traits for good. Being wealthy is wonderful, as long as you’re doing good things with the money. Whatever you have in this world, it’s a tool. This world is full of tools. Nothing in this world is a goal.
That’s what Esav didn’t understand. Esav figured, “This world is the only thing that matters. I don’t care about the rights of the firstborn. I don’t care about the next world. Don’t bother me with that. I’m about to die right here in this world, and that’s all that counts.” Yaakov is completely the opposite. The next world is the most important thing. Right now, we’re working to get up to our levels and do what we can in this world.
I think that’s the message of this week’s parsha. At the end of the day, Yaakov did put on Esav’s clothes. He did put on Esav’s clothes to make sure that Yitzchak gave the blessings to him. And sometimes we do have to put on those clothes. We do have to fight. We do have to pick up guns if we have to, not because we want to.
Wishing everyone a Shabbat shalom. Have a peaceful and spiritual weekend.